The sun is shining. There’s a nice breeze. You’ve got 90 minutes before company comes over for dinner, and everything’s already prepped.
“Mom, can we go to the park?”
You smile at your three-year-old, impressed that the child has progressed from barking monosyllabic orders at you. Six months ago, the request would have been – Park. NOW.
“That’s a great idea, sweetie. Can you pick out your shoes from the shoe basket? Mom’s just going to grab a couple of things,” you say as you start to run through your mental checklist while ignoring the audible cracking of your knees as you stand up.
Time-Saving Playground Mom Hack #1: Create a Perfectly Organized “Park Go Bag” That Will Make Other Elder Millennial Moms Jealous
Actual Reality:
Okay, go bag looks stocked with sunscreen (both types, because he can be picky about the spray sunscreen even though it’s supposedly “fun”), chapstick, first aid kit—replenished with more band-aids after the last trip, extra pair of pants.
I’ll tuck in my beauty bag as I definitely need some lipstick—can’t have anyone calling me The Grandma today. And wait… now that I’m thinking about the weather, I’ll also grab my “beach supplies go bag,” so that I have a beach towel, extra swimsuit and water shoes in case he does the splash pad.
Time-Saving Playground Mom Hack #2: Offer Limited Snack Choices to Empower Your Child’s Decision-Making Skills
Actual Reality:
Alright. Supplies, check. Now, snacks… this will go more smoothly if I let him pick from a couple of options… okay, so, he wants the squeezie pouch. S%#. That has yogurt, and with this heat, I really don’t want to bring dairy to the park… maybe he’ll be open to another option…*
“How about these nice, shelf-stable granola bars instead?”
[Cue meltdown]
Nope, okay, that’s a hard no. New game plan. Grab a cooler. This will work even better. Now I can bring a cold sparkling water, some pre-cut fruit (because apparently only mom has the magical ability to cut strawberries “the right way”), and maybe some chilled wine in a coffee mug labeled “Mommy Juice” because I’ve earned it.
Time-Saving Playground Mom Hack #3: Efficiently Pack Your Stroller Like a Professional Tetris Champion
Actual Reality:
Definitely gonna’ need the wagon today. Hmmmm… okay, if I tetris the beach supplies on the bottom, balance the cooler on top, wedge the towel on the side, I think the child can still fit. Barely.
Uuuuuuuh. Goodness. It was a lot easier to pull this wagon when it didn’t weigh 50 lbs. Maybe I am too old for this. [Struggling sounds intensify] Uuuuuuuh… okay, the cooler can’t go there. Probably want to prevent head injuries and concussions.
Bonus Time-Saving Hack #4: Remember You’re Actually a Grown Adult with Options
[F*!# it]
“Sweetie, let’s take the car and drive to the park today!”
Join us Fridays for the Advance Maternal: Quick Wit series. Start your weekend off right with a little levity.
Leave a Reply